Wednesday, July 18, 2007

The Big Reveal

If you're the parent of a Harry Potter fan or a Harry Potter fan yourself, I'm going to tell you what happens.

You see, I don't believe in keeping secrets.

I'm a member of the's my duty to report the news, and I already know. I know everything that's important about "Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows."

You have to admit this is "news."

I'm a news man.

So here it is...are you ready?

You're sure now?

This is big.

Absolutely positive?

It probably won't happen again.

Personally I think you should know in advance so you can plan for the jolt you are about to receive, but I know there are those who disagree.

So you really want to know before the book is released in a media string puppet frenzy?

You want to know before everyone else on earth realizes this?

Okay, you can't say you weren't warned.

Here goes...

Brace yourself.

This weekend, you'll be able to watch want you want on T.V.

You'll be able to get on your home computer whenever you like, to surf the Internet with abandon, and your children won't complain at all, in fact they won't even come near you.

They'll actually be quiet.

You won't even hear their little thumbs clicking about in curious ways instant messaging their friends on their phones despite having "unlimited weekend minutes."

This is YOUR WEEKEND Mom and Dad...

Think about it.

No kid knocking at your bedroom door.

No kids fighting about what's on TV.

Being able to watch an "R" rated movie in the living room if you really want to because your child will be upstairs...reading.

Sorry, I had to reveal all that today, but I really feel it's an obligation.

I mean, come Monday, no one is going to miss the magic of Harry Potter more than parents.