Wednesday, March 29, 2006

The Call

We haven't seen each other much in recent months...they've been busy...we've been when I answered her call this morning the words stung twice as hard, "Michael, I have breast cancer."

The call came as I was wrapping up work at the office so I stopped dead as my mind rushed with thoughts of how her sister's death from this same insidious disease had so jumbled her life, her emotions, her perspective on God...and I thought how those deep chasms in her soul had only been partially filled by recently finding true love...happiness.

And they are in love...married such a short time they are still life to the fullest with travel and carefree days.

There won't be many of those for a while. The honeymoon is over.

I suppressed my urge to angrily scream aloud to God, "Hasn't she been through enough?"

Instead I softly spoke three small words into the phone, "I'm so sorry."

We spoke for a good while, promising that the recent distance would disappear and that Amy and I will be there for this next part of their journey. It will be hard, for she is still mourning, and loving...and living but now there is an ever-present shadow...a darkness...a fear.

I called Amy and broke the news. When I arrived home she and Amy were speaking-Amy encouraging and praying and vowing we would walk every step of the way with them...the way back to living life to the fullest. Optimism bathed Amy's every word.

Then the call ended and Amy fell into my arms in tears.

There have been one or two calls since but now I am about to make one him.

He and I have grown quite close although our bond has been based primarily around our wives, fine wine, and God. He lost one wife to cancer years ago and I can't imagine how tangled his thoughts must be today. Part of the conversation will be clinical, he knows this road all too well. I'll assure him as I assured her that we will traverse this course with courage...side by side. We will be with them through the get to the best...again.

There will be no distance during these days.

His has been a hard journey too...and to find love again has been such a blessing. To have that joy disrupted so is so sad.

Eventually, I'll have to bring him back...back to suffering and salvation...helplessness and hope constantly reminding him that we will stand together...and kneel together often in these coming months.

I know my words will be of little comfort...there is no comfortable place is this harbor of the torturous unknown. To him they will be merely words right now...for me they will be a promise to him...and to God.

I pray God gives me those words now...for the time has come.

I have to make the call.