Monday, December 26, 2005

You're Not Listening

You're not up this morning listening to the radio...don't worry, I don't take it personally...but some of us have to get up and pretend that people are listening to the radio today. I'm one of those people. I came into work for a few hours to write stuff that some other poor schmoe will have to read over and over and over again until some real news breaks the malls open.

In case you got all caught up in the spirit of Christmas and actually missed important news over the past few days let me give you a recap on a couple of stories of mild...well, that are completely trivial.

First off, Jesus Christ is now walking the streets of New York. He could be driving for all I know, but a judge on Friday granted a guy named Jose Luis Espinal permission to legally change his name to Jesus Christ - effective immediately. Mr. Christ...said he had to seek the legal name change because...well, because he believes he is Jesus Christ, but no one else does. He's hoping with the name change he can get his driver's license, electric bill, American Express card, and the like to bear witness for him. Who would have thought when Christ returned we'd require two forms of I.D.?

This other story is not related I'm sure but while Jesus may be in New York...the "Nun Bun" is on the run in Nashville. The "Nun Bun" had its 15 minutes of fame about 10 years ago when the owner of a coffee house claimed a cinnamon roll in his shop looked like the now deceased Mother Teresa.

This was apparently not so much an act of thievery as one of liberation. Mother Teresa at one point wrote to the coffee shop owner asking that he not capitalize on her image...real or imagined. To his credit the guy did stop selling t-shirts, mugs, and prayer cards featuring the cinnanun. He did however keep the shellac-covered pastry in his shop and the burglar who waltz off with it didn't take anything else.

The owner is convinced the nun bun won't show up on eBay...he thinks the bun bandit will destroy it.

Sacrilege is a two way street I crummy as that may be.

You can go back to sleep now.