Saturday, August 13, 2005

Saturday Morning Ramble

Amy's sleeping...that's a good thing. She's been restless lately. Today we have plans with friends...and that's a good thing too.

Life has been busy lately and I've overlooked - or forgotten to mention - its sillier moments.

I had an elderly woman call me the other morning in the middle of a fairly ferocious thunderstorm. She was almost crying when she asked, "Can you tell me San Antonio's longitude and latitude?"

I realized she was upset, but I couldn't help but giggle a bit in my mind wondering how such a mundane thing could seemingly take on such importance.

"Well I'm watching the Weather Channel (old folks MTV) and they never give specifics about the storm...only the longitude and latitude of where it's worst...I have to drive across town and I don't want to drown!"

I took a deep breath and asked her where she was coming from and where she was going. I looked up street closings and eyed the radar before assuring her that if she stuck to the highway, and drove slow, she'd be fine.

She sounded so relieved.

No one drown in San Antonio that day, so presumably she's still alive.

Robert Norton isn't...he's dead.

82-year-old Robert Norton was buried this a suit. He'd probably be pretty ticked about that...not dying...the suit. He wanted to be buried naked. Norton made headlines on numerous occasions in Illinois because of his insistance that he be allowed to putter around his garden nude. His neighbors had him arrested some 20 times since 1962 for indecency...still he gardened naked and wanted to be buried in the raw too. His brother refused and Robert couldn't really protest I suppose.

On Thursday, Robert Norton - World War Two veteran was laid to his Sunday best.

It's sad he died before September 10th. You might want to circle that day on your calendar. That's World Naked Gardening Day.

They have a website but be forewarned...there are naked people on it.

Robert Norton would have fit in fine with those folks...I'd bet they'd have buried him in his birthday suit.

He'd still be dead though and probably would never be anyone's favorite dead celebrity. Apparently when it comes to having "favorites" we're supposed to have a "favorite dead celebrity." You didn't know that? Actually either did I, so we both better hurry and think of someone because we might be asked to take part in a poll to determine who is America's favorite dead celebrity.

For the record, Lucille Ball is currently number one on the most favored celebrity corpse list...I don't know if she was shocked to win that honor.

The diet doctor, Robert Atkins, was "voted" least favorite dead celebrity...people denied carbs can get really cranky sometimes.

Then again, for protein lovers the news got really exciting this week. Researchers now say they can "make meat" in a test tube.

They may be able to create meat, but I suspect that discovery may create a lot more vegetarians in the long run.

I wonder if they'll garden...