Monday, June 27, 2005

Connecting With The Light

I am a man of faith - I have faith that the light will return soon.

It will not appear with a great blinding optical crescendo, but rather unobtrusively...a gentle flickering glimmer at first which will then steady itself into a constant unassuming glow.

I have seen the light before and I know it shall return.

It will be green.

Please don't confuse me with folks in Roswell whose faith relies upon the appearance - or reappearance depending on their level of indoctrination - of little green men. Likewise please don't associate me with people in Berkeley or the beaches of the west coast whose enlightenment requires certain deep breathing exercises involving greenery...sometimes aided by crystals, flames and or a bong.

Nay, I am not one of those believers.

No my friends, mistake me not either for those whose faith revels in the greed of green tinted paper which falsely portends happiness.

Those are fleeting faiths...mine is time tested.

I am a believer in the resurrection and the light.

Actually the resurrection of the light.

The little freakin' green light on my cable modem which signals that I have a connection to the outside world.

Right now it's dark...vacant...hollow - and it's really ticking me off.

I sit detached from the world - unable to send an email, check in at the office, make adjustments to our bank balance, or publish this bit of wisdom - okay so maybe there's one upside, but cut me some slack my cable modem is out.

In 12 hours or so we will hop in a car and travel north to Austin. We will then board a plane that will take an incomprehensible and indirect route - wasting vast amounts of fuel - before eventually depositing us in Ohio - the reasoning behind this flight pattern is beyond my level of enlightenment although I suspect the people who dream up these cheap airline fares are required to adhere to standards of confusion....perhaps they have stock in Exxon...or friends in Berkeley...or both.

The point is I have things to do before we leave and those things require that I get on the Internet.

Yet I am dead in the digital water.

I know what must be done. I have checked the connections. Unplugged and re-plugged the power supply. There is no sensible explanation for this disruption, the service was working only moments ago and I have not altered my position in this chair much less anything else.

Pathetically I must capitulate for I have no choice. I must call on those who claim a higher power - customer support. I dread is a betrayal of all that I know to be true...the tenets of common sense.

I know from the outset that there will be no "support"...there will be only heretics, put in place merely to placate me, to divert my attention from my convictions with silly questions and requests that I perform rituals spelled out in their dogma...their doctrine...their "customer support manuals."

Yet lacking all semblance of a spine I will comply with their apostasy, first to pacify the "national" help desk and then to placate the cable cultist I will be connected to "in my area." He will convince me to repeat everything I have already performed, duplicate the same mindless rites...knowing full well they will produce the same outcome. I will have no choice, but to appease him...this digital demon.

And then he will say these words, "It's not working."

Despite being armed with this knowledge I will subject myself to this nonsense because I have no other choice. I will let them pretend they can actually come between me and the light...all the while knowing my path will remain dark.


So I made the went exactly as I said and eventually I was told there were only two options: "We can schedule a technician to come out to your home or you can take your cable modem to one of our convenient offices."

Alas, these are not options...I am being misled by false prophets. We will be long gone on vacation before any member of this cable coven appears and I am not empowered to embark on a trek anywhere, I need to get some work done and some sleep, not stand in line to swap out a cable modem.

The technical Pharisee offers no sympathy and no other option.

I hang up in disgust.

And then I see it.

The subtle flicker...which grows into a steady glow.

Why did I allow doubt to enter the equation?

I have been faithless and yet you have been forgiving.

Patience in all things.

I have seen the light...and it is green.