Tuesday, March 09, 2004


A dear friend of mine has a serious issue in her life and I laughed at it.

How horrible is that? Yet, when I detail it here you may very well laugh too.

My friend's mother is dying, and my friend's sister is in control of their mother's health care and funeral arrangements.

The sister told my friend that their mom would be cremated.

She added that her remains would be "put in a cookie jar for burial."

Yes, a cookie jar.

This is not a decision that was made due to some streak of eccentricity or because Mom was famous for her cookies. It apparently is a crass cost cutting move.

It's hard not to giggle isn't it? Even my friend had a difficult time keeping a straight face when she told me about it, but still I know it hurt her deeply. It was a very emotional and substantive concern for her. She doesn't want her mother buried in a cookie jar...who would?

She can laugh a little about it now, because my friend is a strong woman, and she eventually took matters into her own hands. She made arrangements for something more proper. When the time comes her mother will be dealt with in a dignified manner.

Still it got me thinking. How easy it is for us to look at others and laugh at their situations. We don't feel their burden. We are not scarred by their pain. Usually we don't even know their stories.

I hope to remember this story to remind myself that at times we are all very fragile and we should be treating each other gently.

Like little jars of clay.