Friday, September 12, 2003


Physicists say there is no such thing as empty space. Even a vacuum is filled with little marvels of matter or anti-matter, non-matter, subatomic matter or some such matter. None of that really matters to me, I only mentioned it because I had nothing to write about and I wanted to make sure I didn't blow the rules of physics by leaving this space empty today.

I have to admit, I was tempted. I woke up from my nap and realized it was Friday, which is always a nice feeling, but it rarely inspires me to action.

Then I remembered that I was at a local hospital yesterday because my friend Sam was getting a snout-reroute. While there I stumbled upon something I have never seen before...oddly enough in a Men's room.

Yes, that's a urinal.

No, it's not the first one I've ever seen.

However it is the first urinal I can ever remember seeing that had its own stall.

For those of you who might not be as intimately acquainted with such places due to your gender, the traditional arrangement is for urinals to be free standing. Privacy is not required because men have an unwritten rule to always face forward while standing at such places. This not only prevents embarrassing comparisons, but also decreases the odds that you'll ruin some stranger's shoes.

I've been in my share of Men's rooms but, until yesterday, I had never seen a urinal in its own tiny stall. Maybe this is more common than I thought, perhaps these are everywhere, like subatomic particles, and I've never noticed. In any case, it was a first for me.

This was, as they say in the land of un-gentry, a "two-holer" restroom. So there were two stalls.

The second contained the more common commode arrangement.

I will always remember this restroom and, like it or not, I will always associate it with a game show.

Everyone who enters must make a choice.

Door Number One? Or Door Number Two?